Nov 042010
Handshake by Thinkpanama

Connecting with people is a basic human need. When you connect with someone on a deep level, it is easier to become good friends. It is easier to have a smooth working relationship. It is easier to avoid needless conflicts while having greater harmony in your life. One of the ways of forming this connection is to find common ground. No matter how different and unique people are, there is bound to be common ground if you make the effort to look for it. With common ground comes common understanding. Read on to learn how to find common ground to connect with people.

Common Interests

One useful way to connect with people is through shared interests and passions. Nothing causes a person to light up faster than talking about something close to their hearts. It could be a passion for reading or sports or food and so on. When you have the same passion and interests, it becomes a joy to spend time with another like-minded soul. To connect on a deeper level, you could exchange knowledge and ideas on the subject as well. Doing so will strengthen the common bond you share.

Common Experiences

You can also bond with someone else over a common experience. For example, a teacher understands the problems of a fellow teacher. Parents will know the joys and troubles of bringing up children. People who go through the same experience will be aware of the opportunities and pitfalls involved. Sharing a common experience with someone else makes you comrades of sorts. You could reflect on past glories or bond over the struggles you face. If need be, you could also lend a helping hand or advice as you discuss solutions to problems. This will help you to connect on a deeper level as well.

Common Beliefs and Views

Each of us has deeply held beliefs that make up our very identity. If you meet someone else who shares similar views as you, there is a potential to connect on a deep level. After all, you would want to keep people who understand you by your side. With like minds, you can convey much more in fewer words. Under such circumstances, the both of you are likelier to hit it off and become good friends. With this common understanding, there will be fewer chances of conflict between the two of you as well.

Taking Action

When it comes to finding common ground, the little things matter. You should not expect instant success even if there is common ground. A solid foundation needs time and effort to build. But once that foundation is in place, it can support great loads. Similarly, it takes time and effort to form a lasting connection even if there is common ground to build upon. We all need to nurture the important relationships in our lives. Common ground alone is not enough to sustain a relationship. All that it does is to provide a part of the foundation for a meaningful relationship.

What other ways of finding common ground have I have missed out? Do you have any other ways to connect with people? What are your views on finding common ground to connect with others? Do share your thoughts and comments below.

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  13 Responses to “Finding Common Ground to Connect with People”

  1. Hi The Vizier,

    Finding a common overlap between ourselves and another person is a great way to start developing a relationship. It gives a nice platform,to explore other things together.

    Sometimes, we can lose that initial shared ground simply because our interests change or our beliefs are no longer the same. That’s why it’s good to take the time to venture beyond the basic bonds – so that there’s something else to keep us together.
    Scott McIntyre recently posted..5 Side Effects of Settling for a Second Best LifeMy Profile

    • Hi Scott,

      You raise a valid point about how a change in our interests or beliefs can cause us to lose the initial shared ground we had with our friends. As you have rightly pointed out, we should never be complacent. Due to the changes that will happen in life, we should always venture beyond the basic bonds to find other ways to connect with our friends. It is not prudent to rely on only one connection. We should have a variety of connections if possible. In this way, we will always have something to keep us together as we learn and grow.

      Thank you for your comments! :)

  2. Connections are very important for us. It is easy when we have common connections. The challenge is to cultivate uncommon connections, it is these connections that we can grow from and that often can enhance our lives in ways that we had not considered.

    • Hi Mark,

      Nice points you have raised. Common connections are indeed easy. If we can add uncommon connections and find new and unusual ways to bond, we can truly grow in ways that would not be possible otherwise.

      Thank you for your comments! :)

  3. Common ground is an important factor in connections to people. It is often awesome to find people with some common ground and a lot of factors that aren’t common. This lets you find new things to interest you. I never want my friends to be simply clones. I want to experience new ideas and influences from them (and hopefully them from me).

    But without a core of some common ground to build on it is very hard to erect any sort of relationship. It is like building on quicksand.

    Thanks for a great post.

    Hope you are having a wonderful day.
    Steve@Lifestyle Design recently posted..How Much Does it Take to Live the Lifestyle of Your DreamsMy Profile

    • Hi Steve,

      Given the great advice you give on your site, I am sure your friends can gain a lot of new ideas and useful influences from you.

      Relationships need common ground as a foundation to build upon. I like how you liken the lack of common ground in a relationship to building on quicksand. That is a very apt analogy.

      Thank you for your comments! :)

  4. “If you meet someone else who shares similar views as you, there is a potential to connect on a deep level. “Very true. Every entrepreneurs that i have met, i have showed extreme support and love to male or female. . It’s this common thread that keeps connected no matter how far apart our business ideas, partners of ventures may be. Deep and profound, thought provoking post. My first time and hear and no longer my last. Great post.

    • Hi Jonathan,

      It takes an entrepreneur to understand an entrepreneur. It is always heartwarming to see those who have attained success reach out to help others along the way. They do so because they know what it was like to struggle to get to where they are. Thus, they try their best to help others like them to reach their goals. Having this common experience as entrepreneurs definitely goes a long way in aiding connection between people.

      Thank you for your comments! :)

  5. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Marko V., Marko V.. Marko V. said: Finding Common Ground to Connect with People via @AddToAny [...]

  6. This is a powerful concept. I think there is no better and faster way to connect with someone. If we look closer, everyone likes to have a person who shares the common beliefs, experiences, interests and passions.

    Finding common ground is our natural need. We read certain books, magazines and newspapers because there is a common ground. We watch certain TV shows and go to websites because there is a common ground.

    The idea is expressed very clearly Irving, I enjoyed reading this article.

    • Hi Marko,

      It’s always nice to see you here. I like your analogy about how we read certain things and watch certain shows because there is a common ground. It is something that appeals to us on a deep level and so we gravitate towards it. And if we can find people who share these interests, we hit it off with them.

      Thank you for your comments! :)

  7. I like all the three ways of building a connection. In terms of connecting through common experience, it’s where I can share as well as learn from others. In terms of interests, I have got so many that it’s hard to keep track…LOL! As for beliefs, I am hoping to connect with more like-minded friends.
    Evelyn Lim recently posted..The 5Cs of BuddhismMy Profile

    • Hi Evelyn,

      I like how you share and learn from others through common experience. As a result of such a connection, not only do the both of you grow, you bond over the experience as well. Connecting with like-minded friends is always a joy. It is also easier to maintain the friendship.

      Thank you for sharing your experience and views! :)

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